(Sunday Paper, Year IV, Issue 22)

It’s June, so it’s time to turn the Sunday Paper over to some other writers for a little while.

(Don’t worry - if you miss me you can still find me on my Facebook page, or Twitter, or at Comedy Night at Exhibit ‘A’ next Saturday, June 8. Tickets are still available!)

This week, the Sunday Paper is in the capable hands of my friend Suzanna Parpos, a writer who local folks may know from her bi-weekly column in the Framingham TAB…or maybe you saw her perform comedy that one time….

She’ll tell you about that and more in this week’s Sunday Paper.

Just a #BoyMom Who Loves High Heels

Let me take this opportunity to clear up any misconceptions about women, in particular, moms, who love to wear high heels. Though I love my stilettos, I never was one of those girly-girl-wear-pink-all-the-time types of females. In fact, I rarely wear the color pink. I don’t really know why that is – I just don’t gravitate towards buying anything pink – or purple, for that matter.

I love my high heels, but I love my son more. Though I know I could take my son digging for all things creepy and crawly while wearing my stilettos, I don’t. It’s not because I don’t want to get my pretty shoes dirty, it’s because I’d look awfully ridiculous on our creature adventures wearing them.

I’m just kidding – that’s not the reason [fear of looking ridiculous] that I don’t wear high heels for bug-catching. The truth is, I want my son to know I’m fully committed to us and our time together, so the heels stay home when we are on our adventures – be it fishing (more like attempting to fish) – or whatever.

Need more proof that this single mom is willing to do anything for her son? Well, let me tell you about some pets we used to have…I’m sorry but hermit crabs are just about the most disgusting creatures. So, naturally, we had to get one. Then, another two after the first one died. A very long story short, no one – and I mean NO ONE (men included) would touch those crawly things except me!

Did you know hermit crabs are nocturnal? Yes, they sure are and if you aren’t a deep sleeper, no matter the distance that is between their tank and your bedroom, you WILL hear their legs rapidly and eerily climbing the walls of the tank…I still have nightmares – just kidding.

But I’m not going to lie; I’m so happy to no longer be a hermit crab pet owner.

Life has changed much since those crustaceans resided with us. We now have a dog. Yes, for the love of my son, that’s another thing I did. I bought him a dog for his birthday a couple years ago. The crazy thing about that is I didn’t grow up with a dog. I knew nothing about dogs, but I learned. And, don’t tell the breeder, but the first time I ever held a dog was when I met our two-week old puppy, which my son named, Rocky.

I didn’t wear my high heels the day we drove up to New Hampshire to bring Rocky home with us. Like I said, I love my stilettos – like, insane amounts. High heels are a woman’s power tool (I actually explained how that’s true in one of the columns I wrote for the paper). I know I could do just about everything in them, but I don’t.

Because when I’m out in the yard tossing the football with my son, it’s not about me – it’s about him. Messy hair – don’t care…that’s how it often goes when you’re a #BoyMom.

For the love of our children, we do crazy things, like memorize the list of Super Bowl All-Time Results. I’m not looking at anything while typing this – it’s all based on memory recall…the winners of the Super Bowls starting with Super Bowl I are:

Packers

Jets

Chiefs

Colts

Cowboys

Dolphins

Steelers

And the list goes on. So far, I’ve memorized Super Bowls I – XX.

I don’t know when I’ll ever use the aforementioned information – maybe I should become a sports reporter. My son is frequently impressed with my knowledge of the games of football and basketball, in particular.

I know this to be true because, he’ll say: “Wow, mom! You know more than I thought about _______.'“

For the record, my favorite Celtics player of all time is Paul Pierce.

Yep, I’m breaking all the barriers and stereotypes of women, in particular, moms, who wear stilettos…just because we like pretty shoes, it doesn’t mean we won’t get in the dirt and catch bugs, toss a football or be the only one (male or female) to give attention to some creepy crustaceans, all for the love of our son(s).

Oh, and since it’s almost summer, and in case you were wondering, I don’t wear high heels to the beach. For the chance to feel the warm sand underneath my feet, I’ll gladly put my flip flops on and head to the shore.

Writing

*I’m celebrating 8 years of writing my bi-weekly column for the Framingham TAB newspaper. When I started freelance writing it, I was just hoping to make it to year three. Now, here are I am, well beyond that original goal and so happy to know that I haven’t put readers to sleep (yet) with all that I have to say.

The first four years of the column were personal essays. In the fifth year, I started weaving back-and-forth between the personal essays and a participatory-style of journalism, known as, ‘Suzanna In the Community’ pieces.

Year 8 will mark a major milestone: my 200thcolumn; I’m excited to see what else the new year brings.

Comedy

*I am not a comedian, so I typically wouldn’t have a section with this heading. More than likely, there’d be one titled, “Baking,” and I’d tell you about my famous (locally-famous, not worldwide-famous) Greek cookies that I love to bake.

You’re in luck, though! As it so happens, I actually do have something to write about in the Comedy Section. Recently, I lived many people’s worst nightmare: trying Stand-Up Comedy. You can read all about my 8-minute-set at the Wicked Local Comedy Night to benefit Voices Against Violence and the comedian that was my mentor on my 6-month road to Stand-Up. Here’s your hint as to who that comedian is: Think Jets fan living in a Pats world.

What I’ve Been Enjoying

*A friend recently recommended the book, “Can’t Hurt Me,” by David Goggins. So far, I’m enjoying the read and now more than ever, I want to be a United States Navy SEAL, or at least train with them for one of my ‘Suzanna In the Community’ stories.

There’s one minor set-back to my plan of either becoming a Navy SEAL or attempting to survive their Basic Training. The best way I can explain the minor set-back is to tell you what happened when I tried CrossFit for a story for the paper. To sum up that experience, I was exhausted after the warm-up “pizza game.” And, well, to see how the rest of my “workout” went that day, check out the photo of me and the Co-Founders of CrossFit Firewall. Yes, I let Dave Dubin and Alex Buckler do all the heavy lifting while I sat and relaxed…I may be wrong, but I just don’t think that approach to working out will go over well at Basic SEAL Training.

Notes

*We are officially in the swing of Spring – the Red Sox are back at Fenway and I don’t have to wear my winter parka every day of the week…gotta love New England weather and its indecisiveness. [Ed Note: This was written in April but kind of still works based on how inconsistent the weather has been so far this spring.]

*Soon enough, though, it will be summer, which means it’s time for everyone to get their beach reads ready. That is, of course, if you’re a beach-reader – maybe you’re like me and you prefer to just watch the tide go in and out.

*For all those who do like to read, whether it’s at the beach or somewhere else, I have two recommendations for you. Here are the links for a couple really great books: A Year on Route 30: One Mom’s Collection of Essays and Awakening The Blank Canvas: A Collection of Essays Continues.

*If you want to keep tabs on where I’ll go next with ‘Suzanna In the Community’ or catch up on all the things I’ve tried so far - here I am on my website and here I am on Facebook.

*Thank you, John, for the invite to guest write on the Sunday Paper. And, thank you to all who took the time to read my post!